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cardboard testimonies June 25, 2008

Posted by peterong in Uncategorized.
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my good friend kenny sent this to me and i wondered if the Asian American church could survive this kind of authenticity.

surprised (blindsided) by compassionate Reformed Theology June 14, 2008

Posted by peterong in City Seminary, Reflections.
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I just got back from my week long intensive classes at Westminster Theological Seminary (WTS)as part of my City Seminary degree. I had a mix bag of emotions coming into this week; a part of it was the turmoil at WTS in light with Peter Enn‘s dismissal due to his book Inspiration and Incarnation (a list of articles here) and the other part was of excitement to be at the school that has been part of Dr. Timothy Keller and my pastor, Stephen Ro.

I am an ambivalent Reformed pilgrim, there is so much good in the relentless pursuit of truth but somehow I am always moved to pause by the pride and corrective postures so many Reformed people take. They are spiritual naggers. But yet, I love the historical orthodoxy that it comes with and it has been part of my tradition through my years at Redeemer Presbyterian Church and also through my reading lists online as well as my home library that are riddled with Calvin, Murray, Owen, Luther, Van Til but yet I occupy this space where I am friendly to the emergent church, the postmoderns and I revel at Driscoll, Mclaren (much less so nowadays), Campolo. So I swing between two worlds of theological underpinnings…I feel like a spiritual mixed breed. or a traitor o sorts to both camps. But as I thought this out, I feel that there is a third way, and it is a conversation that will continue to mold me. Not to be polarized by the two but rather to focus on wrestling through the gospel. (more…)

model minority or minority model (denial of privilege?) June 10, 2008

Posted by peterong in Asian American, Rants, Reflections.
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A report was released today regarding the state of Asian Americans in Academia as reported in the New York Times. It has this quote: 

“The report quotes the opening to W. E. B. Du Bois’s 1903 classic “The Souls of Black Folk” — ‘How does it feel to be a problem?’ — and says that for Asian-Americans, seen as the “good minority that seeks advancement through quiet diligence in study and work and by not making waves,” the question is, ‘How does it feel to be a solution?'” (more…)

disguising the “inner life.” June 9, 2008

Posted by peterong in Uncategorized.
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i walked out of the apartment at 5:30 am and it was already 80 degrees as I got into the car. the heat was unbearable as i approached philly and made the turn into Westminster. it was hot. hot. hot. but to my delight, the classrooms are well air conditioned.

my first few hours at Westminster has already made me feel uneasy (not just the environmental heat but an internal friction) and it is not necessarily a bad thing. dr. ortiz stirred us to think that sometimes we are very happy in “darkness” because light jolts us and i reflected on my ongoing struggle with spending time in the mirror…here is my conclusion…

i have been in retreats of silence, i have spent focused time of meditation, i have been stilled on both walks on pavements as well as mountain stones, i have been guided retreats where doxology dances into solitude and focused listening. yet, somehow, i always remain with vacancy. i have been told that this time of solitude is one of great intimacy but i find that it is in conversation that i feel a deeper sense of god’s presence. it is not that i don’t like solitude with God. it is a discipline that i cherish each morning, each evening that i have a devoted of affection and seeking truth in knowing God but this depth of my inner life seems tragically shallow when i compare it to others. yet, i feel that i have plumed the depths yet i arise with no new missing treasure.

as i have conversations about “emotionally healthy spirituality” i wonder how much is this unpeeling has been upgraded to level of unnecessary complexity. is there something wrong with me if i can’t find shards of my brokenness. i feel that sometimes, i create these chronic paranoias about if i am not really going deeper. but how deep do i have to go? don’t get me wrong, i take caution and diligence in my pursuance of my depravity and my need for redemption but how deep do i need to go? how much is this a luxury of western christianity to create layers and layers of diagnosis.

so here i am…the first day of a week long intensive of seminary and already, i am confronted with a prick of discomfort and i wonder if the heat outside is somewhat a better alternative.